You are not defined by what tempts you. Just because a person may be tempted to be intimate with someone of the same gender, that does not mean that he must give in to that temptation, or that he is destined to be a homosexual. If a married man is tempted to cheat on his wife, that does not mean he must give in to that temptation or that he is destined to be an adulterer. Temptations to steal, lie, do drugs, or commit other sins do not make a person guilty of those things. What defines us is how we choose to respond to those temptations.
Many do not realize that temptation itself is not sinful. Our sinless Savior was tempted in every way we are, yet He never sinned (Heb. 4:15). Though temptations are not inherently sinful, a person must be careful not to let temptation grow into sin. It is one thing to notice something that could be sinfully appealing; it is another thing to dwell on it, feed it, or act upon it. For example, there is a difference between innocently noticing an attractive person and allowing thoughts to go uncontrolled, imagining sexual intimacy with that person. Jesus said,“Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart” (Mt. 5:27-28). Allowing temptation to linger and develop further is how sin occurs (Jam. 1:12-16).
While our choices can define us, our past choices do not have to define us permanently. People can change. Paul reminded the Corinthians of this: “Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God” (1 Cor. 6:9-11). The Corinthians changed when they repented and had their sins washed away in baptism (Acts 18:8; 22:16). God then forgave and forgot (Heb. 8:12), and they needed to continue walking in the light faithfully, confessing sins in repentance as necessary for forgiveness after baptism (1 Jn. 1:6-2:6).
The world says if you are tempted, “That is who you are,” but God says you can choose differently (Josh. 24:15; Deut. 30:19). He will always provide a way to escape every temptation (1 Cor. 10:13). Do not allow temptations to discourage you or convince you that you are evil. Choose what is right, and God will bless you. “Blessed is the man that endureth temptation: for when he is tried, he shall receive the crown of life, which the Lord hath promised to them that love him” (Jam. 1:12).